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Nikki's story

Pokie machines will eventually be the death of me. I’m 34 and started gambling when I was 28. Started off very small, once every few weeks $20 here and there. Until I won big. That was the day I wish I never won. 

After winning so big I have done crazy things to feed my addiction. I gave my kids up because I chose to gamble before paying rent or buying clothes/feed them. I sold everything and anything that was worth money, including myself. 

I got loans upon loans, credit cards, personal loans, payday loans, advances on pays. I pawned my things, I got mobile phones and sold them. I stole from people I love. I am so ashamed of what I have done in the past 8 years. 

I have probably lost around $200k give or take but who really knows. I’m sick of living the life. I want to be free of the constant struggle. I wake up every single day thinking of ways to get money just to gamble. I lie, cheat and steal to get money. I’m not a good person. I actually hate who I have become. I’m at a point right now, if I don’t get help it will be too late. 

Right now, I have my kids, a house, a car, 2 jobs. I’m doing well BUT I still gamble and if I don’t stop this moment, I will lose it all. All it takes is getting 1 week behind in rent, have a day off work because of the “gambler's hangover” not paying my bills on time. All it takes is for it to spiral out of control for a couple of weeks and there is no turning back it’s a dark and lonely road.